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The Edge of Knowing

Dear Wild Hearts,

Today I wanted to share with you a vision of Radical Self Care, that can fill your cup to overflowing, and give you the courage and strength to be your authentic self.

A simple practice of using essential oils, your olfactory nerve, and aroma.

For most of my life, I was dangling by the strings, orchestrated by a part of my unconscious, my protector, Sarah, myself, the willing puppet.

I suspect Sarah was formed from all my careful assimilations of my life before I was 7. Sarah had internalised I was a bad girl, that I was not worthy, lovable, and definitely not enough.

Sarah developed a perception of what sort of girl could be all these things and set about orchestrating.

I can see how sweet, kind, frivolous, helpful and caring, had been my trade for belonging and acceptance… survival in a dangerous world.

I am so grateful for all that Sarah did to protect me.

I am also not Sarah.

She was a child’s perception, a puppet persona…. And, as such, could not live an authentic, joyful, creative adult life, full of confidence and actuation… in fact, she is the very definition of being held back by lack of self-confidence.

I can also see the times this puppet persona cracked under the pressure of life events, trauma, marriage, immigration, babies, house moves, new schools, more house moves, marriage stress….

There was depression
There was pervasive stress
There was constant uncertainty
There was panic
There was anxiety
There was insomnia

Postnatal anxiety, staying home for almost a year. There were times I was overwhelmed by the school parking lot and could barely manage to cross it. There were times I was shaking before attending an event.

Hands up, I really had done a number with Sarah, and perhaps it is not quite so strong with others…. The thing is, I know we all have a Sarah… and we all have a puppet persona, created with love, by our young psyches....

I suspect that depression, anxiety, and stress is our edge, it is our authentic self calling for help, longing for the strings to become our reigns. To be here, fully present. To feel our edges, our knowing to be heard.

I think it is time for a Radical Self Care Revolution, and to let the tired puppets sleep… all the armour, all the perceptions… all the critical self-talk that comes with them. Just rest.

Our birthright is creativity, worth, love, and joy. You are enough is the truth, anything else is a wrong perception in need of healing.

Be there when Life Happens…

What if we honoured the moments in our lives that were big, drew a line in the sand, and declared it an event. We celebrate, we grieve, we get really present.

How much sooner would I have truly felt the puppet strings… how much more softly would I have fallen from my fantasy world, had I done this?

Listen to your Body…

Right to the moment of a woman having her monthly period, and feeling uncomfortable, brain fog, and tired, we let the moments slide. The exuberance of Summer, the rest of Winter, transitions from child to teen, adult, parent, grandparent. These are our seasons.

Listen to your feelings…

We push ourselves through moments of life, a child starting school, illness in the family, an odd moment with our partners, parents, dare I add pandemics… we try to go for “normal” handing the strings to the puppeteer, blinding our true perceptions.

I invite you to join me in a  world full of people who know who they are.  Who honour themselves fully and come from a place of deep nourishment, and wholeness in all they do and are. A world of people who can feel themselves, know themselves, trust themselves.

Join me in my world where you could use aroma to rewire your brain permanently, snipping those strings free.

Pattern disruption, from autopilot to KNOWING
Every morning, Wake up and pause. Pattern disruption from any automatic morning actions and thoughts! Have a vision board or mantra to immediately bring to mind to have a set point for the day. Your unique you, your knowing. Use an oil you can anchor this intention with, an oil that inspires you. Whatever works for you, that immediately connects you, with yourself, to your inner truth.

Once you feel your center, take your oil of choice and breathe it in deeply. Feel all the feelings of you in your skin, your worth, your love, your enough. Feel your knowing inside, surrounded by the edge.

Set yourself up for Success

Move your body. Make good food choices. Meditate. Journal. Listen to a motivational talk or read an inspirational book. Anchor with the oil.

Feel Amazing

Dress - I am led by aesthetics - so for me, I like to wear a party dress every day, makeup, and jewelry. Make sure the oil you have anchored the intentions to is in your pocket and ready for the day.

During the Day

I can guarantee that things will go wrong. Reconnect with the oil and intention as soon as you realise what is happening for you. Have a commitment to total compassion for yourself and your version of Sarah.

When you hear a should, or you are not good enough, or nobody will like it… Call it out. Find that checkpoint. Feel the edge.

Walk in your feel-good clothes, change your posture, hold your head up high. Remember the mediation and journaling set point, so if you are feeling hijacked, or feel some of Sarah’s strings tugging, you can bring yourself to your new equilibrium with a sniff of your chosen oil

Your Edge

Find your edge. Every day, every moment, with everyone. This is the place of sacred interactions, authenticity, and confident action.

I leave you with one final image. Harry Potter walking across the field to Voldemort, certain death, willingly, alone, and in secret.

This is brave as it is vulnerable and certain. These moments of self-confidence are the quiet moments, the dream before we breathe life into it, the 30th time our new idea is rejected, the moment we say I love you, we let go as our child takes their independence. This is the Edge. The discomfort, the moment alone, the feelings of disappointment, the feelings of putting ourselves back together for another risk, another hope, another dream.

With love
Nikka

Quality DoTERRA Essential Oils have an enormous role to play in healing, their unique accurate chemistry works directly with our limbic system in our brains. They work on the physical and emotional aspects of our health. To book a class please email me, they are £5 and run regularly every month.

If you would like to hear my 45 min presentation about how to use essential oils and emotions and to rewire your brain, send me an email.

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